Albuquerque, NM
Phone: 505.265.7215
Email: info@trousertrout.net

Quiz

13-Question Quiz - Trout or Other Fish in the Sea?

This quiz is designed to help you determine where the men in your life land in the spectrum of True Noble Trout versus Other Fish in the Sea. If possible, get your guy to take the quiz with you.

When the two of you go somewhere in the car, he opens the door for you:
A) almost every time.
B) if you're dressed up for a special date.
C) only when you've got your hands full or ask him.
D) infrequently.
E) if he's got you bound and gagged.

He feels like spawning but you aren't in the mood. He:
A) suggests a sensuous activity like a massage or a soak in the hot tub.
B) snuggles for a while to see if he can arouse you.
C) pulls out his collection of girlie magazines and goes off to satisfy himself.
D) gets all huffy and goes off to sulk.
E) goes ahead and does what he damn well pleases.

When driving somewhere you've never been before, he:
A) thinks ahead and gets specific directions.
B) takes a map and tries to figure it out as you go.
C) gets to the general vicinity and asks for directions only as a last resort.
D) tosses a pile of maps in your lap and tells you to get busy.
E) drives around until the destination magically appears.

He has a choice of two free tickets to a sporting event, a movie or an outdoor cultural festival. He:
A) discusses the most appealing option with you.
B) calls up a buddy and invites him to the sporting event.
C) does what most appeals to him without consulting you.
D) tries to get free tickets for all three events.
E) takes another woman to the event of her choice.

In the bathroom, he leaves the toilet seat:
A) lid closed, seat down.
B) lid up, seat down.
C) seat up.
D) up or down, depends what he did there last.
E) sprinkled with yellow spots.

He's just been out with you for the first time, and you enjoyed each other's company (no sex was involved). He says he'll call and he:
A) calls the next day to say thanks and suggest another date.
B) calls within one to two days to ask how things are going.
C) calls after a week has gone by.
D) never calls again.
E) starts making obscene phone calls to you in the middle of the night.

He runs up a $300 phone bill while living at your place, gets laid off, and can't pay you back immediately. He:
A) borrows from his credit card and pays you back in full all at once.
B) pays you back in full on an agreed-to schedule.
C) makes a few payments and stops when money gets too tight.
D) gives you something he thinks is the equivalent of what he owes, such as his record album collection.
E) moves to another state, declares bankruptcy and puts you down as a creditor.

You have both had a rough day at work. You want to talk and all he wants to do is blast monsters on his computer to unwind. He:
A) sympathetically listens to you unload about your day, then goes to blow up monsters for both of you.
B) says, "I've gotta kill some demons. I'll be back."
C) grabs a beer and turns on the computer without saying anything.
D) says, "Can't you see I'm busy? Leave me alone."
E) grabs a real gun and starts shooting up the place.

He's been asked to represent his business in a meeting with the city council. Surveying his wardrobe, he selects:
A) a dark suit, well-pressed shirt, understated tie (his best GQ look).
B) a sport coat, khaki pants, cartoon character tie (his usual office attire).
C) a black leather jacket, black T-shirt, black jeans (his in-charge look).
D) whatever clothing he can find without a large rip or stain.
E) a T-shirt with a rude slogan and athletic shorts.

He's decided that the six-month relationship you've been having isn't living up to his expectations or hopes. He:
A) initiates a discussion about "the relationship."
B) initiates an argument about "the relationship."
C) clams up and watches TV.
D) leaves without warning.
E) mails you a photo of himself and another woman at the beach with a note saying "The weather is great, glad you're not here."

Someone asks him about the culture of tuna fishing in Japan, a subject about which he knows next to nothing. He:
A) admits to knowing very little on the topic and suggests other resources.
B) states he's not an expert and hazards a guess.
C) talks about Japanese food, automobiles, stereo equipment.
D) says, "Sorry Charlie, we don't want tunas with good taste, we want tunas that taste good."
E) holds forth with gusto on the topic.

He's invited a small group of friends over for a casual dinner. He serves:
A) fresh grilled salmon, spinach salad, potatoes au gratin, fruit and cheese for dessert, served with a top-rated Chardonnay from his extensive wine collection.
B) baked chicken breasts, chopped frozen spinach, baked potatoes, ice cream for dessert, served with white table wine.
C) frozen fish sticks, canned peas, Tater Tots (baked with the fish sticks), Oreos for dessert, served with cold beer.
D) carry out Chinese food, right out of the carton, with the fortune cookies for dessert, served with cheap tequila.
E) A beer, and announces it's potluck.

To celebrate a significant anniversary, he's inclined to select the following kind of gift:
A) extravagant and substantial, like good jewelry or an exotic vacation.
B) thoughtful yet affordable, like flowers, chocolate, champagne, dinner at a nice restaurant.
C) practical, like a garage door opener or garbage disposal.
D) selfish, like power tools.
E) perfect, like a one-way ticket to Tahiti for himself.